i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Randomize