Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
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