I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Randomize