I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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