Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
