Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
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