when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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