Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
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