As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
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