i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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