never play flip cup with pint glasses
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize
