cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
