And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Randomize
