Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
