Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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