BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
