It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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