Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I think my moral compass just broke
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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