I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
