dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
