I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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