i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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