Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
It's just like the Real World with babies
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
