I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
