her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
you are never too drunk for berry picking
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Sorry about my life...
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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