i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize