Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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