I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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