Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
We talked him into tasing himself.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
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