I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
