He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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