Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
