I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
