Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
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