I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MIDGETS
????
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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