Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
