The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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