The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
I woke up under a house in Key West
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