Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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