My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Congratulations! We have a period
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