There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
you inspire me to be a worse person
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
