Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize