is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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