Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
