yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Randomize
