normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I look better un-naked...
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
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Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
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You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
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