ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
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The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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