i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Randomize