I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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