There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I'm both gender and math confused
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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