if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
